Monday, May 19, 2014

What I Can't Control

If anyone hasn't guessed by now, I am a writer. I write fiction. In my brain are thousands of stories, characters I call my own. By chance you would hang out with me, you might see me mouthing words to myself maybe a few times. And that's just me.

Not a lot of people have read my works. (expect for the Monday Minutes Challenge) I haven't written much fiction on this blog either. None of it is especially good. In the future, though, I do hope to have some kind of writing career.

Why do I like writing so much? There are many reasons actually. One of them is that I like to have something that I can not only imagine, but control. No matter how uncontrollable life is, my stories are always my own choice. I can choose which stories to put on paper. Mistakes aren't that a big deal either. If I reconsider killing a character, I can bring it to life just like that. I can break a heart, mend another. It's that simple.

Unfortunately, life isn't like that.

Okay, I know what you're thinking. Well, duh. Of course you can't control life. I know that. Being a writer means I have to continually remind myself of that.

As much as I wish that my story is real, it's not. My characters are different sides to me. They help me get through things. But just the same, they're not real. It's hard to admit, but it's truth.

I was reminded of that this past weekend. I had a hard time doing something that was the right thing, but it was sad for me. The pain was much more than anything I felt when I killed my favorite characters.

But through every trial and pain, there is hope.

Even secular stories have reminded me of that. Peeta. Olaf. I think it's because that everyone never wants to avoid hope. We need hope. Things get hard, but when hope comes, no one rejects it.

I will remember that there are many things in life I can't control, but Jesus does.

Even if I could control things, I probably would mess things up. In a terrifying mess, it's hard to see Jesus' love. Our reminder, our hope, is that God controls what we don't. He sees what we don't. Most of all, he loves when we cannot.

I am a writer. I must realize that life isn't stories. Other than myself, there is nothing I can control. God does what I can't. He keeps the whole world under his arms. My unfailing hope is that He is in control.

PS: On the whole writing subject, I'm going to start posting some writing advice. I really like writing blogs and I decided to share some techniques I've noticed from my favorite books that have helped me. So stay tune.


  1. This post is wonderful. This completely describes me. I am a very "controlling" (not as bad as it sounds, but you get the jest. lol) person. I like to have my ducks in a row. I stand back and survey the situation, figure out what need to be done, and do it. I make a plan. I set a timer. But I cannot control life. Things get thrown at me, and the real reason they hurt me so much is that I can't control them. I've tried. But my plans never work. Only God is in control. I also understand completely the part about the characters being part of me. I've discovered that: each character is a main trait of mine. Either one I want to be, one I am, one I am inside, but I don't show anyone, etc. The rebel. The a+ student. The shy one. The popular one. The one who has all the friends, and the one who hides in the corner. Every one of them reflect me. But I need to reflect God.

    Okay, that was a long rambling comment. The end. ;)

    1. Thank you! It's fine. I love to hear your thoughts. I agree with you totally:) God is good.


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